Strength for the Journey

Relying on God in our strange trip with Mitochondrial Disease

I’ve gotta let it shine….

With everything happening in the world recently, it’s been hard to focus on any one thing to blog about.

The news just bombards us moment by moment, reminding me who the real “Prince of this World” is; that being the Prince of Darkness.

Everywhere I turn I see dark acts committed by people whose motives I can’t even begin to understand.  Who wakes up one day thinking “Alright, teeth brushed, shower done; let’s go bomb a marathon!”?  Darkness.

People drawn to murder others with knives, or guns, or bombs.  One person jealous of another.  The next motive greed.  Children abused,  some sold into sexual slavery.  Darkness.

It can make my heart so heavy.  It makes me want to grab my children and hide under the covers.  But I can’t.

This little light of mine,
I’ve gotta let it shine….
Let it shine, all the time, let it shine.

Think about it:  on a dark night, what do you notice?  The lights.

In the midst of all of this chaos, I have to do my best to be a shining light, not hiding.

You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:14-16

I can’t claim to understand all that is happening.  I only know that I must do what I can to spread the light.

But what can I do?  What can you do?

love your kids
hold the door open for someone
donate blood
buy someone coffee
know your neighbor
send a card to someone
make a phone call
pray
pray
PRAY

So tomorrow, I hope to return with a little humor.  Humor tends to be my way of dealing with tragedies.  In doing so, I hope that others can see HIS light shining through the darkness.  ‘Let there be light’ indeed.

The Golden Hour

I prayed for them,
made promises to God
if He would just
bless me.

I was thrilled
when I discovered
their tiny presence
within me.

I spent months preparing,
weeks in anticipation
days in waiting
to see them with me.

I was so filled with joy
as I held each of them
and counted their fingers
as they reached for me.

And now, as they have grown,
as much as I love them
I find I can hardly wait
for them to go to bed without me.

Some days I live
for that golden hour
after they are asleep
and it’s just my husband and me.

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Sunday

On Sunday morning
I greet the day and head out
to a reunion.

Brothers and sisters
together, one body,
one blood, Lord and faith.

We greet each other
with smiles and sincere questions
of how have you been.

We join with our Head,
hearts and souls with our singing
praises to our God.

I leave renewed and
ready for the week ahead.
Thank God for family.

Severe Weather Alert

Whirling, and swirling. Running, and gunning.  Smashing, and trashing.  Shouting, and pouting.
Rolling.  Climbing.  Hiding.  Digging.  Banging.  Breaking. Yelling.  Sliding.
Dirty.  Noisy.  Curious.  Silly.  Handsome. Sweet.  Loving.
A blonde tornado.  A blue-eyed scamp.
My always moving, rarely still,
inquisitive, little
boy

Make me a servant

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The sweet young face and curly hair
of my precious wordless girl
remind me that my time is short
upon this fractured world.

I carry her, as Jesus does
my own disabled soul.
My shaky steps supported
as I head towards my goal.

I think of Jesus often,
as I serve my little dear;
how he washed feet and held the hands
of outcasts who were here.

I cannot claim perfection,
but I’m better than I’ve been.
And like the moon reflects the sun,
I try to mirror him.

So, Lord, I’ll be your servant
as I help my little girl.
For she’s among “the least of these”
you spoke of in this world.

My firstborn is me

My firstborn is me
in a slightly different form.
Her mood swings and
impatience used to be my norm.

I look at her and see myself
reflected long ago
and wonder what she understands,
how could she ever know?

My firstborn, mini-me
smiling, filled with pride
demonstrating knew-found knowledge
wanting me by her side.

I know that things will change,
as she rails against my rules,
I only hope she’ll always know
that I’m nobody’s fool.

I’ll do my best to help her know
just where she needs to turn
I’ll point her towards our God above
and pray that she will learn.

Although she is my mini-me,
I also know it’s true
that she is she; she is not me
she’ll find her own way through.

She’ll make her own decisions.
She’ll make her own mistakes,
and when she’s grown, I’m confident
that she’ll have what it takes.

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On airing out the house

The sun shone bright
with the promise of a spring day.

I prepared to open the windows,
air out the winter blahs and
breathe in some fresh air.

APRIL FOOL!
It’s only 35 degrees.

Well played,sunshine, well played.

Happy Valentine’s Day

This week one of Mama Kat‘s prompts was to write about a memorable Valentine’s day.  My most memorable one was eleven years ago.

Tom and I had been dating for just over two years.  I was getting anxious (is this going anywhere????)

We had talked marriage, and it seemed to be a matter of timing.  I just wasn’t sure if he would really make the move.  After all, I’m six years older than he is.  Would that make a difference?

A quiet Valentine’s Day had been planned.  Tom came over to my apartment and fixed dinner; chicken cordon bleu… from scratch. :)  (have I mentioned what a great cook my husband is?)  He had brought me a couple of small gifts, and I had something for him.

We finished dinner and went to the living room to watch a movie…. or so I thought.

We were just getting the movie going when Tom got up, went to the kitchen and asked if I wanted some sherbet for dessert.  I said sure, and heard the bowls clinking as he prepared our treat.

When he walked back into the room I glanced over, then did a double take as he got down on one knee.  He held a bowl, but the bowl held no sherbet.  Instead, there was an open ring box, and I listened to Tom ask me if I would make him the happiest man in the world and marry him.  I remember looking from his face to the ring, from his face to the ring, trying to let it sink in what was happening. Of course I said yes. ;)

He had totally caught me by surprise because Valentine’s Day was cliche, and he made it a point to not be cliche.  If anything I had thought he might propose on April Fool’s day, in line with his prankish nature.

I’ll never forget the anxious look on his face as he knelt there.  I found out later that he had been showing the ring to people at church the night before:  literally right behind my back.  He had carried the ring on his person from the time he bought it so that nothing would happen to it.  My parents also told me that he had come and talked to my dad a few days before to “ask permission.”

I could never have guessed all of the things life would bring our way.  Tom has proven himself time and again to be a man who seeks God’s will and stays faithful to his promises.

God places choices in front of us each day.  We are given the free will to do as we choose; for good or for bad.

So that day in February I was faced with a choice.

And I’m so glad I said ‘yes.’

I love you Tom!

Sick Day: a Tale in Three Parts

I

Illness stalks my home
turning children into seals
barking in the night.

II

Hear the sad whining;
sticky hands rubbing tired eyes;
snuggled on the couch.

III

Pray for a healing
wind to blow through our sick home
and restore my kids.

That’s random…

So this week Mama Kat has has asked us to share 5 random facts about me and my family.

1. The summer after I graduated from college I worked at the Fort Wayne Children’s Zoo and drove the train for the majority of the summer.   After working my way through college, I just wanted a job that didn’t require a lot of thinking, and this one fit the bill.  It was awesome, and I have wonderful memories of that time.  

2. When I was a kid, I had an imaginary friend named Karate, and she had a cousin named Judo who sometimes joined us.  I have no idea where I got the names.  We had some fun times together. :)

3. My husband and I met on a blind date.  A woman he worked with wanted to introduce us, but I put her off for quite a while because I had just reached a state of contentment with being single and I didn’t want to mess with that.  Finally I told her “Look, as long as you don’t expect me to marry him, fine, I’ll meet him.  He’ll hate me, I’ll hate him and we never have to see each other again!”  Needless to say, it didn’t work out that way.  ;)

10 years ago

10 years ago

4.  My son is a hillbilly.  He refuses to keep socks and shoes on.  Barefoot is the way to go for him!  He is also I climbing little monkey and always into mischief!

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Note the bare feet….

5.  We have lived in the same house for all of our marriage.  We wouldn’t mind moving to a slightly larger house, but that’s not in the cards right now.  Two years ago friends from our church put a ramp on the front of our house for Erin’s wheelchair.  We are very thankful for our church family!

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